Let’s celebrate June

What happened to May? Well this website had an attack of glitches: little mini monsters that sneak up in cyberspace : causing incapacity and invisibility.  The frustration is immediate; whilst panic slowly creeps in with dread like feelings in the pit of the tummy as the realisation that the website is no longer to be found.  Luckily, with a trusty web manager, help and reassurance is nearby and with some serious spondoolies sent the website way, here we are, back in business, celebrating June at feelingoodatfiftyplus.com.

Unfortunate as glitches go; it is good to keep this in perspective: it’s not the end of the world (although it felt like it for a while!) and it’s all rectified now so no harm done: we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves down and carry on: upwards and onwards!

However, all experiences in life give us opportunities to reflect and grow: I have learned the value of patience, acceptance, and faith in the process – letting go of frustration and blame.

In this age of advancing technology, patience in the form of waiting is not the norm: thanks to the global network we can access what we want at the touch of a button: banking, shopping, researching, communicating all within a moment, a blink of the eye. Perhaps a casualty of this speedy life is the ability to stop and wait patiently.  Not to harp back to the ‘Good old days’  (well I will….) but there was some mileage in having our needs met over time rather than instantaneously : we could think about a purchase e.g. a new coat, save up for it, plan a day’s shopping expedition, then physically shop for it and return happily with our new coat. I remember when I was a young student, really wanting a duffle coat (like Paddington’s) and the pleasure I had from going through said process was wonderful.  I still have happy memories of wearing my beloved duffle coat that lasted for many years until it became too threadbare to look good.  Somehow it’s not the same looking up images on ‘tinternet, choosing, paying and having it delivered without a journey out.  Perhaps it’s just me being a bit of a Neo Luddite (ahem, get the currency!) but it’s all a bit one dimensional when we shop via a screen: I prefer the sensory experience myself; speaking of which, I’m off shopping for a couple of bits and pieces now!

We’ll have a look at our beloved countryside: investigate how to make ourselves happy and consider the merits of a low…very low…almost no sugar diet.

Lovely to have you back!

Rosie@feelingoodatfiftyplus.com    imagesCANDN1GI

Stress reduction and why you really need to keep calm in your fifties

Here’s the thing: it’s highly likely that we will suffer some sort of major trauma in our fifties.  This could result from anything on the stress scale: divorce; bereavement; major health issues; family troubles; moving house changing jobs or redundancy.  And on ……and on……  Stressors are a normal, natural, expected aspect of the aging process, particularly in this age group.  What’s important is the effects of stress on the fifty something wellbeing.  If we are resilient, we can bounce back from adversity (stress)  feeling stronger, healthier and more optimistic than before.  If, on the other hand, we are vulnerable at this time, for whatever reason, we can suffer a stress reaction that has physical and psychological repercussions into our sixties.  That means that we can be more prone to and run a higher risk of key physical ailments that can impact on our wellbeing.  These include:

Heart and circulatory problems:  type 2 diabetes: raised blood pressure (hypertension): weight increase: slower walking distance: sleeplessness: mood changes: depression and anxiety.

So it’s really really important that we keep ourselves as resilient as possible.  There are techniques that we can use in order to help us overcome negative situations; but the key factor is to be prepared for stress so that it does not overwhelm and injure when it happens.  How do we prepare for stress?  Does that mean that we live in a state of constant anxiety, nervously anticipating horrible outcomes?  No, quite the opposite!  It’s actually simple and achievable.  It’s about living in the moment: appreciating what we have: developing an optimistic character, by consciously perceiving the good out of situations, rather than looking at the negative.  It’s about detaching from the stress which is hard depending on what’s happened, but it’s a way of coping that is important.  It’s about adopting a personal support mechanism with yourself so that you are able to sooth yourself to prevent excess worry.

No matter how much we try to prepare for stressful situations though, our bodies and minds react in an instinctual way, creating a rush of adrenaline that is difficult to avoid.  What we can do is WASP.  Wait, Absorb and Slowly Proceed.  Let yourself feel stressed: relax and take things slowly until you can cope.  Remind yourself that this feeling will pass and sooth yourself by releasing your stress the best way you can without hurting yourself or causing  injury.  Cry, shout, sleep, walk, run, talk to someone, read books, write it down.  Tell yourself affirmations: there are plenty online that will give you strength to cope.  Yoga, meditation, absorbing hobbies are ways that you can sooth and care for yourself.

A dear friend of mine is facing terrible stress just now.  She will probably never work again: she may have to be registered disabled for the rest of her life: her marriage may not survive the devastating effects of the stressful situation she finds herself in.  She is feeling shattered, hollow, broken and hopeless.  But there is always a new day, and with it hope for recovery.  Life is precious.  I believe that she has the strength of spirit to gradually heal and adapt.  By accepting her situation she will slowly heal and one day she may find calm, peace and happiness again.

I very much hope so.